1. So der Sturmtrumper and his minions have decided to go full-on Fascist this year, which should come as no surprise to anyone. I’ve been trying to put together a longer post on this for a while now but it just ends up as incoherent rage-screaming into the void because of the sheer fuckery of it and that’s not even fun for me to read let alone anyone else. At this point I put the odds of the United States actually having any sort of election in November – let alone one that counts as free and fair – at roughly even. And for every day der Sturmtrumper lets his stormtroopers rampage through American cities, shitting on the republic and the Constitution alike, those odds go down. This is what Fascists do – they take over. And this is why Fascists have to be opposed by patriots.
2. Yes, Fascist. I’m a historian. I know very well what Fascist means. This is it, specifically the Nazi version of it, adapted for modern times. If Trump and the GOP don’t want me to call them Nazis they should stop doing what the Nazis did. And if his supporters don’t want me to call them Nazis they should stop supporting him. Until then, fuck you very much you goddamned Nazis.
3. Just pointing out, once again, the simple historical fact that this country used to give medals to people who shot Nazis and we called those people The Greatest Generation. You cannot be a good American and a Nazi. We had a war about that. The whole world was there.
4. Yes, the Nazis were Fascist. Stop saying stupid things and just deal with that fact. Also, the next time some gibbering loon uses the term “left-wing Fascism” I will go spare. Repeat after me, children: There is no such thing as “left-wing Fascism.” Fascism is an ideology of the right. It is the totalitarian form of nationalism, which has long been the exclusive property of conservatives. The left has its own form of totalitarianism (Stalinism, or Soviet-style Communism, if you’re interested - the totalitarian form of socialism, which you will note is not itself totalitarian) and does not need to adopt the totalitarianism of conservatives. You own this one, right-wingers.
5. Yes, the official name of the Nazi Party was “National Socialist German Workers Party,” and it has the word Socialist right in it! It does! I know that makes your little heads explode with right-wing glee pointing that out, Trumpers, but nobody with a three-digit IQ cares. To be frank, I suspect “eggplants” really fry your circuits too (“There’s eggs! Right in the name!”). Thanks for playing. Now run along and let the grown-ups talk.
6. Meanwhile the disgraceful American response to the current pandemic continues unabated. We’ve flattened the curve! Vertically, yes, but flattened it nonetheless. When the history of this time is written there will not be nearly enough obscenity in the language to contain all of the well-deserved scorn that future generations will have for the sheer aggressive stupidity and toddler-level entitlement with which the right-wing has responded to the current crisis and dragged the rest of us down to their level in the process.
7. Of course der Sturmtrumper and the rest of the GOP are demanding we sent our children back to school in the middle of a raging plague that they have done absolutely nothing to solve, even as their children do nothing of the sort. Because the cruelty is the point with these bastards. Folks, there are law firms offering free living wills to teachers now because that’s where this is headed, and every yearbook in America next year will have a page dedicated to the students and staff who died needlessly because of this demand. Every single one of them should have an explicit credit to Donald Trump and his supporters for boosting the funeral industry in these perilous economic times.
8. Do Americans realize that we’re trapped in the US now? That our passports are useless because the rest of the world is just so horrified at the grotesque show that der Sturmtrumper’s response to the pandemic has been? I hope you enjoyed the US being counted as a leader on the world stage for most of the last eight decades, because that ship sailed the moment der Sturmtrumper was appointed president and likely will never return.
9. Of course, the fact is that the Only President We Have spent the last week bragging about not being declared legally senile and 40% of the nation is actually proud that their Dear Leader is still somehow able to jump over that bar despite all available evidence to the contrary, so perhaps it is best if the US slinks off the world stage for a while. At some point the grown-ups will take over again and after that perhaps we can work our way back up to respectability, but for right now this is clearly not the case.
10. REM told me I’d be feeling better about things right now.
(That’s a Gen-X joke, kids. Now get off my lawn.)